Life is an accident. You just get here and do what you can. ‘Life is the mode of existence of protein bodies’.
I don’t have regrets that last long. But from time to time I regret many things. I’ve always done things I regretted, but I kept doing them anyway. And regretted them again.
I love a lot about life. Times change and so do my preferences. But I always exist in love with something. I love to be learning something. I loved physics. Now I love geography and Google Earth. I love our summer house, love working here. Don’t expect me to say that I love my family. Would it say more about me than my love of geography?
I’m rarely afraid of anything. Fear turns into resistance against the fear. But I’m worried about things quite often, on a daily basis. I worry about my granddaughter getting home; she lives in a different country but I need to know she’s ok. I don’t need details. It’s her life. But I need to know she is living it. We have this rule; everyday we send each other a message that we are alive. I am not sure for whom it’s more important: for her or for me. We are good friends.
I think about death because my phone book has become much thinner, and I can’t not think about it. People of my age are dying. It’s the norm. I make a lot of jokes about death. It’s me and my wife, we’re old, we need to joke about it. I sense that I’m getting to the end, but what is it? It’s unclear. But it’s just another event, not a philosophical question. It’s just ok.